Mabuhay Kabataang Pilipino!

Mabuhay Iskolar ng Bayan!

POLLS

SA BAWAT PAGPATAK NG LUHA

Major Charaters

Carlo/Lider - isang UPCAT passer mula sa isang malayong baryo sa Zamboanga.

Tacio/Papang - Papang ni Carlo, 43 taong gulang

Ana/Mamang - Mamang ni Carlo, 45 taong gulang

Oble - ang makahulugang simbolo ng Unibersidad ng Pilipinas



Minor Characters

Tasha, Marie at Harold - Blockmates ni Carlo sa UPV

Miyembro - kasamahan ni Carlo sa isang mass organization sa UP



Voice

: “Isandaang taon ng karunungan. . .
isandaang taon ng pagsisilbi sa bayan. . .
isandaang taon ng militanteng pamumuhay!

Ito ay tatak ng Unibersidad ng Pilipinas – ang tahanan ng bawat Iskolar ng Bayan; Iskolar ng Bayan na hindi lamang matatalino. Ang isang tunay na Iskolar ng Bayan ay matapang – matapang para sa pagnanais na makamit ang isang tunay at purong demokrasya para sa pamayanang Pilipino.

Dahil sa tagal na pagganap sa responsibilidad sa bayan, nararapat lang na ipagdiwang ang sentenaryo nito. Ngunit sa gitna ng pagdiriwang na ito, isang mapait na katotohanan ang nais ipamulat ng aming dula.

Ang kahirapan at pagdurusa ng bayan ay hindi lahat dulot ng mga may kapangyarihan. Kung may mga mahihirap na mas lalong naghihirap at kung may isang taong hindi makakain ng tatlong beses sa isang araw, may maling nagaganap. Pero lagi sana nating tandaan, na lahat ay may pananagutan SA BAWAT PAGPATAK NG KANYANG LUHA.

SCENE I

(Curtains Open)

(Hinihingal si Carlo. Pinagpapawisan. Tumakbo kasi siya sa kanilang bahay mula sa eskwelahan niyang halos dalawang kilometro ang layo. Naabutan niya si Mamang niya na nagtutupi ng mga damit.)

Carlo

: Mang! Pang! Andito na ako! (Hinihingal.)

Ana

: O, Carlo.Hinihingal ka yata. Pinagpapawisan ka pa. May humahabol ba sa iyo? Magbihis ka nga muna doon at nang hindi ka matuyuan. (Si Carlo nagmamano.)

Carlo

: Mang, pumasa ako sa UP! Yes, Mang! Sa UP ako mag-aaral ng college!

Ana

: Talaga anak? Pero, Dong, malayo ang UP. Malalayo ka sa amin.

Carlo

: Mang?

Ana

: O, siya. Sa susunod na lang natin yan pag-usapan. Malayo pa ang graduation niyo. At saka, tulungan mo nga muna ako dito . Yung ate mo andun nag-iigib ng tubig sa may bomba kina Manang Celing kasama ang dalawa mong kapatid. Dito ka muna.

Carlo

: Di pa po ba dumarating si Papang?

Ana

: Ay, naku. Medyo madilim kanina pagtanaw ko sa may bundok. Tiyak umulan doon. Maputik na naman. Maya-maya siguro eh darating na rin iyon. Hhaayy. . . Sana lang eh nakasilong yun. Mahirap na ang magkasakit. Ah, dito ka muna at ako ay magwawalis.

Carlo

: Opo Mang. (Nagwawalis si Ana.) Kumusta na po pala ang ani sa bukid?

Ana

: Hay. . . Mahina pa rin talaga dahil sa mga bagyong dumaan. Baka hindi na naman makapag-aral ate mo next year. Kaya, ikaw Carlo, mag-aral kang mabuti, I-maintain mo lang iyang pagiging Top 1 mo hanggang graduation dahil iyan lang ang magkakatulong sa iyo sa kolehiyo. Alam mo naman na 100 % Free sa WMSU ang mga Valedictorians. (may narining na mga yapak) Papang mo sa siguro iyon. Salubungin mo nga’t ikaw na ang magdala ng kanyang mga dinadala.

Carlo

: Opo Mang. (dali-daling sinalubong si Itay. Kinuha ang dala-dala nito)

Tacio

: Hhaaayy. . Salamat Dong. Meron pa doon. Pakikuha na rin.

Ana

: O, Tacio, Basa ka. Ay naku naman. Magbihis ka nga muna doon at nang makapagpangape ka.

Tacio

: Hhaaaayy. . . (hinubad ang tshirt. Kinuha ang nakasablay na t-shirt sa sulok at sinuot) Lugi na! Paano makakapag-kolehiyo yang binata natin? Napakalaki pa naman ng pangarap niyan. Hhaaaaayyy. . .

Ana

: May awa ang Diyos. . .

Carlo

: Mang, kanina ko pa nga sana sa iyo gustong ipaliwanag. Pang, pumasa ako sa UPCAT. Sa UP ako mag-aaral.

Tacio

: Eh, narinig mo na rin lang ang pinag-uusapan namin, paano ka namin mapapag-aral sa unibersidad na yan? Yung ate mo nga eh hindi pa rin makakapag-aral sa pasukan.Gipit na talaga. Mahal na ang lahat. Pati edukasyon, mahal din!

Carlo

: Sa UP nga Mang, Pang. Nabasa ko itong buong sulat kanina. May scholarship palang ino-offer sa lahat ng pumapasa sa UPCAT. Yun bang tinatawag na ‘Iskolar ng Bayan Program’, kung saan income ng pamilya ang ginagawang basehan kung magkano ang babayarang matrikula. Sa sitwasyon ba naman nating ito, eh sigurado na wala akong babayaran. May matatanggap pa akong allowance sa UP.

Tacio

: Dong, masyadong malayo ang UP dito. At, isa pa, wala tayong perang pampamasahe mo. Anong gagawin mo tatalon mula rito papuntang. . . San ngang UP iyan?

Carlo

: Iloilo po.

Ana

: Yan, tingnan mo ang layo!

Carlo

: Pero ito lang pag-asa natin. Alam ko UP ang magiging solusyon sa kahirapan nating ito. Gagawin ko ang lahat para makapag-aral.

Tacio

: Oo, ipagpalagay nating maganda nga ang resulta ng pag-aaral sa UP. Pero tingnan mo naman Carlo, ni pamasahe, eh wala tayo. Hindi maganda benta ko ngayon.

Carlo

: Mang, Pang, gusto ko po talaga sa UP. Kung payag po kayo, eh umutang po muna tayo para sa pampamasahe ko. Ako po ang magbabayad pag nagkapera ako.

Tacio

: Ay naku tong batang to oh. (Kakamot ulo.)

Carlo

: Seryoso at desidido po akong mag-UP. Ako po ang magbabayad ng uutanging pampamasahe.

Tacio

: Hhaaaayyy. . . Wala kang makakasama papuntang Iloilo. Paano yan?

Carlo

: Pang, malaki na ako. Kaya ko na. Para rin po naman ito sa ating lahat ang gagawin kong ito.

Ana

: Siya. . . siya. . . Pag-uusapan na lang namin yan ng Papang mo. Sige na. Tapusin mo na yung ginagawa mo.

(Lights off)

SCENE II

(Lights on)

(Sa UP. Sportsfest Era)

Carlo

: Grabe no? Ang dami nang napanalunan ng Bluechips sa Sportsfest. Ang dami dyan, hay naku, wala pa rin. (Pumasok ang ,mga raliyista.) Grabe no? Sportsfest na sportsfest, eh may mga nagrarally pa.

Tasha

: Yah. . . UP eh! Heto o. May binibigay pa silang leaflets. Tungkol yata iyan sa tuition fee increase. Hhhaaayyy. . . Sabi ng ate ko sa Miag-ao na huwag na raw tayong makialam sa mga ganyan-ganyan. Gugulo lang daw buhay natin niyan.

Carlo

: Patingin nga niyan. . . (kinuha ang papel. . . binabasa) Akin na muna to ha. Tapos mo na yatang basahin eh.

Tasha

: Hah? Daaahhh! As if, binasa ko. . . It’s boring. . . as in B-O-R-I-N-G!!! Boring!

Carlo

: League of Filipino Students. . . LFS. . (binabasa)

Tasha

: Yah. . . Those who do not have other things to do in life but to rally. . . and rally. . . and rally. . . but, what then? May nangyari ba? Wala! It has been two decades ang fight for tuition fee increase. . . But look. From eleven pesos na tuition noon, it’s 1000 ngayon! OMG! You know what? This paper deserves a crumple. (Kinuha ang papel kay Carlo, tapos gin.crumple at tinapon. Phone rings.) Upz. Someone’s calling me. . . (kinuha ang phone) Oh, it’s dad. Well, it’s sermon moment. Sige, I’ll just go muna sa GCEB CR. Kitakits na lang dyan sa cafè.

Carlo

: Hindi na. Wala akong pera eh. Diretso na lang ako ng dorm at matutulog. Sige, Halong.

Tasha

: Okay. . . Halong! Bye. . . (pa-flirt flirt)

Carlo

: League of Filipino Students. . . ang mga matatapang na Iskolar ng Bayan. Sila yung mga matatapang na estudyante na nanguna sa First Quarter Storm noon sa UP sa kasagsagan ng Martial Law. Ang galing! Napakatapang talaga nila! Hmp? Magpapa-orient ako.

(Biglang papasok si Harold at Marie na may dala-dalang makakapal na papel.)

Harold

: Hoy Carlo. May pinaiwan nga pala si Sir. . . Basta yung sa Philo natin. . . Nag-iwan siya ng mga notes doon sa photocopier sa may bookstore. Yun daw yung babasahin natin para sa mga susunod na klase. May recitation daw pagkatapos.

Carlo

: Grabe naman ang Prof na yan! Unang araw pa nga lang ng klase eh may ipapaphotocopy na kaagad? Nakakainis naman.

Marie

: Ganyan nga raw dito sa UP eh! Academically-inclined talaga to the highest level.

Harold

: Ewan. Basta 22 pesos yung binayad ko. Tapos, sabi pala ng CG natin sa JPIA na i-remind daw kita ng kulang mo sa Sportsfest. 150 yata yung kulang mo.

Carlo

: Ah. . . Patay(pabulong) Grabe naman tong mga orgs na ito sa paninigil ng mga fees. Hay. . . Sige, punta na muna ako ng photocopier.

Tasha

: Okay. .! Halong. . . Babush! (umalis sa eksena)

Carlo

: Patay. . . Paano ito? 35 na lang yung pera ko dito. Tapos hindi pa dumarating STFAP Allowance namin. Haaay. . . (tiningnan ang cellphone) Mag-aalauna na pala. Hindi pa ako nagaalmusal at nanananghalian. Hhaaayyy. . . (dinama ang tiyan) Pa-photocopy ko lang ito. 35 minus 22. . . 13!. . . 13 na lang. Ibibili ko na lang to ng. . . Hmp? Wag na lang. Tiis muna. Baka may kakailanganin na namang photocopy next time.

(Lights off)

SCENE III

(Sa tambayan sa harap ng GCEB. Nakaupo si Carlo habang nagbabasa ng aklat.)

Carlo

: Hay. . Grabe pala itong napasukan ko. Akala ko magiging okay na ang lahat pag nakapasok ako ng UP. Hindi pa pala. Liban sa problema sa bahay, napakarami rin pala akong haharapin dito. Hay. . . mali lahat ng inaasahan ko. Pagod na ako. (Lilingon kay Oble) Oble! Mabuti ka pa. Hindi ka napapagod diyan. Napakamatiisin mo. (dinama ang tiyan) Sakit ng tiyan ko. Di ko na yata kaya pa kahit ang maglakad. Nahihilo ako. Haay. . . Kung may mabibili lang sana itong. . . (kumuha ng barya sa bulsa at binilang) Walong piso. Mahal kasi lahat dito sa siyudad, Pamasahe, langis, kuryente, tubig, pagkain, pati tuition sa UP, mahal. (Phone rings) Hello mang? Napatawag yata kayo?

Ana (voice-over)

: Mangungumusta lang sana dong. Musta ka na dyan? Nakapananghalian ka na ba?

Carlo

: Ah. Opo Mang. Kanina pa po mga alas onse, May klase po kasi ako 11:30 to 1. Kaya kumain muna ako bago pumasok. Kayo po dyan, kumusta po?

Ana

: Ganun pa rin dong. Tulad pa rin ng dati. Mahina pa rin yung benta. Lalo na ngayong maysakit si Papang mo.

Carlo

: Ha? Ano pong nangyari kay Papang?

Ana

: Paiba-iba kasi ang panahon dito. Ulan. . tapos biglang iinit. Init. . . tapos biglang uulan. At yung Papang mo kasi, pagdating na pagdating galing ng bukid, eh pugon kaagad yung kaharap. Ayun. Nanghina.

Carlo

: Hay. . . Eh, pinapainom po ba ng gamot si papang?

Ana

: Wala nga. Wala pang pera. Baka sa Linggo, makakahanap ako ng mauutangan para pambili ng gamot.

Carlo

: Huwag po kayong mag-alala Mang. Sabi kasi ng OSA eh baka sa Lunes maibibigay na yung allowance namin. Ipapadala ko po kaagad para maipacheck-up na at mabilhan ng gamot si papang.

Ana

: Ay, dong. Wag na. Sa iyo yan. Mas kakailanganin mo yan lalo na’t nasa malayo ka. Siyudad pa.

Carlo

: Paano po kayo nyan?

Ana

: Okay lang kami dito. Huwag mo kaming alalahanin. Tapos yung inutang natin pampamasahe mo, eh wag mo na ring alalahanin. Kung magkapera kami eh kami na rin ang magbabayad.

Carlo

: Mang, ako magbabayad niyan. Huwag niyo na po yan alalahanin. Pumasa po ako sa exam ko sa call center. Hinihintay ko na lang po ang resulta ng client interview ko.

Ana

: Anong call center ka dyan? Mag-aral ka! Huwag ka na munang magtrabaho. 16 ka pa nga lang. Focus ka muna sa school.

Carlo

: Mang, pag araw naman yung klase eh. Gabi po yung sa call center.

Ana

: Ay naku tong batang to. Paano ka nyan makakapag-aral nang mabuti? Pinapatay mo na yung sarili mo niyan!! (toot. . . toot. . . toot. . .Iiyak si Carlo.Yuyuko. . And lights off.)

SCENE IV

Carlo

: Kaya ko naman eh. Kaya kong pagsabayin lahat ng iyon. Dalawamput-araw na oras na gising? Pag araw, sa UP? Pag gabi, call center? Di ba madali lang naman? Kaya ko naman. Kung iniisip nilang hindi ko kaya, pwes, papatunayan kong mali silang lahat. Pangarap ko lang namang alisin sa kahirapan ang pamilya ko. At alam kong magagawa ko iyon. . . Kung bakit pa kasi nag-UP ako eh. Kung bakit ko pa kasi sila iniwan. Napaka-ambisyoso ko. Di sana ako ang nagtatanim sa bukid. Di sana ako ang nagbabantay at nag-aalaga kay Papang. Di sana ako ang nagtatrabaho doon at nakakapag-aral si ate. Kasalanan ko. . . kasalanan ko. . .!

Oble

: Hindi mo kasalanan!

Carlo

: Ha?. . . Sino yan?. . . Sino ka? (another spot focuses om one person) Pa. . pamilyar ka. . .

Oble

: Oo. . . Ako nga. . Si Oble. . Narinig kitang umiiyak. Darama ko ang pait ng iyong dinaranas ngayon.

Carlo

: At kasalanan ko ang lahat ng ito!

Oble

: Hindi mo naman kailangang isisi iyan sa sarili mo. Ang, ibig kong sabihin, wala kang kasalanan.

Carlo

: Anong wala? Maling-maling ako sa desisyon ko na mag-UP. Maling-mali ang desisyon ng bawat Iskolar ng Bayang tuald ko na dito mag-aral. Awang-awa ako sa kanila. Awang-awa ako sa sarili ko.

Oble

: Hindi. . . Maling-mali ang iniisip mo. Wala kang kasalanan. Ang paghihirap ngayon ang naging bunga ng kataksilan at kapabayaan ng iilan.

Kataksilan. . . Kataksilan ng aking administrasyon at ng iilan na nasa posisyon. Kung hindi sana inaprubahan ang pagtaas ng matrikula. . . kung wala lang sanang komersyalisasyon. . . kung wala lang sanang EVAT. . . Kung walang oil deregulation. . . Di sana’y hindi nahihirapan ang mga mahihirap na pamilya. . . Di sana’y walang nagugutom.

Kapabayaan. . . Kapabayaan ng iilang Iskolar ng Bayan, Halos mag-iisang siglo na akong nakatayo at nagtitiis ka makangalay-kamay na posisyon. Tinaggap ko ang bawat pagtapon at pagbato sa akin ng mga kataksilan at pang-aabuso ng mga taong nasa upuan. Pero mapalad akong sa kabila ng pagbatong ito, may mga matatapang na handang sumalo, magpatama at lumaban sa mga taksil. Kung wala ang mga taong ito, kawawa ang bayan. At sinasabi ko sa iyo Carlo, salamat dahil isa ka sa mga sumasalo, nagpapatama at lumalaban para sa bayan. Napakatapang mo. Hindi ka sumusuko sa kabila ng kaliwa't kanan mong mga problema.

Carlo

: Namulat lang ako sa kung gaano kahalaga ang kumilos. Pero, kapabayaan? Paano Oble?

Oble

: Hindi natatapos ang lahat sa UPCAT. Ang pagpasa ng UPCAT ay hindi lamang isang opurtunidad. Ang pagpasa sa UP ay isang responsibilidad at obligasyon. .

Carlo

: . . . sa bayan(umagaw eksena.)

Oble

: Tama. Isang hamon ang naka-ukit sa mga letra sa aking paanan. Sinabi ni Padre Florentino sa sinulat ni Rizal sa kanyang El Filibusterismo:

“Nasaan ang kabataang mag-aalay,
ng kanilang kasibulang buhay
ng kanilang adhikain at sigasig
sa kabutihan ng bansa?

Nasaan ang siyang puspusang
magbubuhos ng dugo
upang hugasang luriat ang ating kahihiyan
ang ating kalapastangan
ang ating kabalintuan?”

Oo, may nag-alay ng buhay. May gumanap sa responsibilidad na ito. Pero, napakalungkot isipin na marami pa rin ang hindi nakakaintindi. Marami pa rin ang bingi! Marami pa rin ang bulag! Marami ang manhid! Bingi sila sa tawag na tulong mula sa mga taong-bayang naghihirap! Bulag sila sa mga pasakit na dindaranas ng iba. Pero sige, ipagpalagay nating hindi siya bulag at bingi. Pero ano pa rin ang ginagawa ng mga ito? Nagbubulag-bulagan! Ngbibingibingihan! Sila pa naman pag-asa ng bayan. Iskolar daw ng bayan.

Carlo

: Yan nga ang napapansin ko. Mas lalong naghihirap ang bayan dahil hindi nakikialam ang ibang tao sa mga bagay-bagay ukol sa kanyang paligid. Iskeptisismo ang dahilan ng patuloy na paghihirap at pagdurusa.

Oble

: Napakamakabayan mo Carlo! Mapalad ang UP sa pagkakaroon ng gaya mong handang lumaban para sa kapwa Pilipino. Mabuhay ka Carlo! Mabuhay mga Iskolar ng Bayan! (inangat ang kamao)

(lights off)

SCENE V

(Settting: UPV City Campus Opening Exercises 2008. As usual, may rally. Galakat ang mga aktibista halin sa audience area. Pito sila kabilog. Ang ila lider gadala sang megaphone. Samtang may garally, may ara man mga estudyante galabay labay lang.)

[ang naka-italics sa baba ay ang mga pasigaw na sagot ng mga kasamahan sa rally.]


(Lights on)

Lider

:Makibaka! (Huwag matakot!) Huwag Matakot! (Makibaka!) Oil Deregulation (Ibasura!) Pabigat na E-VAT! (Ibasura!) Tuition Fee sa UP! (Ibalik sa dati!) Ibalik sa dati! (Tuition Fee sa UP!) Edukasyon! Edukasyon! (Karapatan ng mamamayan!) Karapatan ng mamamayan! (Edukasyon! Edukasyon!)

Welcome mga Iskolar ng Bayan! Ang bagong academic year 2008-2009 ay napakamakahulugan sa buong UP System. Ating ipinagdidiriwang ang ika-isandaang taon ng ating unibersidad. Subalit napakalungkot isipin na sa likod ng kasiyahang ito ay isang napakamalungkot na kwento. Ang mga bagong Iskolar ng Bayan ay siyang magdurusa sa inaprubahang pagtaas ng matrikula. Ang tanong, Bakit ganito? Hindi ba UP ay isang state university na subsidized ng gobyerno? Nasaan na ang badyet para sa edukasyon? Bakit pinagtatakpan at pinoprotektahan ang interes ng gobyerno? Bakit hindi nito kayang ipagtanggol ang karapatan para sa isang de-kaledad at murang edukasyon? Na sa unang-una, obligasyon at responsibilidad ng estado na ibigay ito sa bawat Pilipino!

Miyembro 1

: Huwag din sana nating kalimutan na ang ating mga pamilya ay nahaharap din sa napakaraming krisis: mahal na langis, mahal na bigas, mahal na kuryente, mahal na tubig, mahal na mga bilihin. Lahat Mahal! Kasama na rin dito ang isyu ng korapsyon, underemployment at political repressions.

Miyembro 2

: Na sana’y edukasyon ang maging sagot sa pangarap ng bawat mag-aaral. Na sana’y UP ang maging tulay nito. Pero, paano na ito makakamit kung kahit pati UP, na siyang tinawag na “Kolehiyo para sa mga Mahihirap” ay maikokompara mo na sa mga pribadong unibersidad na makabutas-bulsa ang matrikula!

Carlo

: Napakalungkot talaga ang mga bagay na ito lalo na ngayong ika-isandaang taon ng ating unibersidad.

(Everyone freezes. Lights off. . .)

(Lights on, but dim, seeing Carlo on the ground na nakahiga . . . spotlight focuses to Carlo)

Carlo

: Hoy! (binalingan ng pansin ang nga nagtatambay sa benches) Iskolar ng Bayan! Hindi ba dapat kumikilos ka? Di ba dapat, pinagsisilbihan mo ang bayan? Anong ginagawa mo? (tumingin sa audience) Anong ginagawa nyo? Nagbibingibingihan? Nagbubulagbulagan? Na sana’y makita nyo ang mga pagdurusa ng kapwa niyo Pilipino! Ng kapwa nyo kabataan! (may umiiyak) Di nyo ba yun dinig? May umiiyak! May humihingi ng tulong. Si Oble. Tiyak kung si Oble yan. Siya rin ay nagdurusa. Hhaaaayyy. . . Kawawang Oble. Tsk. . .tsk. . . tsk. . . Dahan-dahan siyang tinatraydor at sinisira ng sarili niyang administrasyon. Dinggin nyo siya! Hinihingi nya ang tulong nyo. Alagaan natin siya. Protektahan natin siya sa mga umaabuso sa kanya. Tayo lang ang kanyang inaasahan. Kumilos ka, Iskolar ng Bayan!

(Back to Normal)

Iskolar ng Bayan! Sama-sama tayong kumilos! Magkaisa tayong lahat! Para sa ating unibersidad! Para sa Bayan! Para sa kapwa nating Pilipino!

Iskolar ng Bayan! (Tuloy pa rin ang laban!) Tuloy pa rin ang laban! (Iskolar ng Bayan!)

Voice
: UP. . . dati'y isang pangarap lamang . . Nang natupad, ay pinagsisihan. . . Ngunit kanyang nabatid na ang UP ay hindi lamang lugar para sa matatalino. . . Dito niya natutunan ang lumaban. Hindi lamang sa sariling pangarap na maihaon sa kahirapan ang kanyang pamilya. Kundi ang lumaban para maprotektahan ang karapatan ng bawat Pilipino. Lumaban para sa mithi ng bayan. Hinding-hindi siya natitinag ng pagbabago na dulot ng oras. Kahapon ay naumpisahan ang laban. Ngayon, patuloy pa rin ang laban. Laban para sa kinabukasan. Kinabukasan ng kanyang pamilya. Kinabukasan ng kanyang sarili. Kinabukasan ng UP. Kinabukasan ng bayan Ipagpatuloy ang isang militanteng pakikibaka kahit maging kapalit nito ay ang pagpatak ng luha.

-END-

A Bright Nightmare

On the 18th day of June 1991, I first saw the beauty of this world. Joined by the forces of love of Expedito Saguino and Isidra Alcoser, a James was born in a peaceful barrio in Naga, Zamboanga del Sur (but now a part of the Sibugay province).

I learned how to read and write when I was three because my neighbor had a ‘videoke’ machine and I often sing there every night. I started my elementary days when I was five but I stopped after3 months. Imagine! In our English class, for three months, all the lessons were about ‘standing line’, ‘curve line’, ‘sleeping line’ and all the lines. It was so boring so I decided to stop. I transferred to a kindergarten school. It was very fun indeed. There were no ‘line’ lessons at all. What I enjoyed most was the singing and the playing time with my classmates (who were mostly my childhood friends and my neighbors) and with my teacher.

I was a naughty boy before (but now I am not). When I was in Grade 1, my classmates and I were always urinating at the garbage area at the back of our room. One day, recess time, the janitor burned the garbage. We were told by the janitor not to go there. But we still insisted to go. We urinate there. Unfortunately, my companion pushed me towards the blazing garbage. I was badly burned from the feet up to my knees. I was absent from the class for almost a month. During those absences, I cannot use my feet to play. I was in great disappointment those times. But a person I saw in a television show inspired me. He, instead of using the injured part of his body, used the other parts for recreation. I think for a while. He can do it and so can I. I started to write poems and songs. I read many books. I practiced my writing and speaking skills.

Years later, I realized that the disaster I encountered before became a way for me to know myself more. I joined different contests such as ‘story telling’, ‘talumpati’, ‘vocal solo’ and more. I joined the writers guild and voice and speech choir in our school. But the most significant thing that I did was in my Grade 6. I joined the press conference, which is a contest between schools in the field of broadcasting and campus journalism. Since then, I have started to love journalism. I pursue it until high school. I became the editor-in-chief of our school gazette. I have decided to take either Mass Communication or Journalism in college. But my parents were telling me not to take it because of the journalist slaying issues. That is why I am taking accountancy now. But I cannot put away myself from writing. I am still doing it without taking the course.

Even your experiences are comparable to nightmares, there is/are reason(s) why those things come into your way. It is because there will be other consequences that could be beneficial to you in other ways. I did not expect that the inferno that touched me and brought disappointments and frustrations to me could help me know myself more deeply. Without those things, I might not know what my goals and ambitions are. I might not know that I could be happier even if I lost something because in anything lost, there is always a replacement which is more better and could make you feel better than before.

Who is the Greatest Person on Earth?

Who is the greatest person on earth?

Jesus? Buddha? Mohammed? These were all inspiring to some people (not just by ‘some’ people but almost ‘majority’ of the people in the world). Millions have died and billions have undergone persecutions because of religion and these persecutions and sufferings continue at present.

Could it be Galileo Galilee, the ambassador of science, who invented the telescope and was the first to see the universe for what it really is? In the Time 100 List of 2006 for the world’s most influential people, it includes George Clooney, George W. Bush, Oprah Winfrey, Bill and Melinda Gates, Pope Benedict XVI and Pope John Paul II, Hillary Clinton, Mahatma Gandhi and a lot more.

But why did the magazine consider these human beings as the greatest persons in this world? Because they were the people who greatly influenced the world─ changes and molds it into another identity. But why do we really have to recognize them? In fact, it is our will to be influenced. It is our choice.

They do not really have the control to the world. So, who is that person we can really consider as ‘the greatest person on earth’?

Well, who is it? The answer is only a three-letter word— YOU.

Why you? It is because the most important in your world is you. Pause…Think for a while…Who else could it be? Who brushes you teeth? Who changes your clothes? Can those people listed in the Time 100 do these things for you? Of course not!

Is there someone else? Perhaps, there is, but it was when you’re still a kid. But you are not kids no more. You have the control of your world!

What you’ve been doing for many years is to put yourself after everyone else. Has this been effective for you? How has this been working for you?

Here is a story. There was once a high school student. He had many friends. He became the first honor from his first year up to his third year. He became prominent in his school. His attitude changed. He shouts on his classmates whom he considered as ‘dull’ individuals. He just found out that he was losing his friends. One night, he realized that he was becoming a monster. He just slept. And when he woke up, everything had changed. He felt better.

When you feel better, you will be friendlier. When you are friendlier, your world will seem a lot better.

This applies the "Golden Rule". "Do unto others what you want others do unto you." The point is how you are, is reflected to others. Once you give value to yourself, the people you acquainted with will feel you value them. They then will value you. This is what we called mutualism. The thought of putting others before you seems worthless. You should not teach others how to treat you.

Here is another example. Who of you here have been flown in a plane? What is the safety speech when the plane loses pressure and the air masks drop? If you have a companion/s, whose mask do you put on first, yours or his or hers? Why is that?

You put on yours first for you to be able to assist others easily, right? If you look at yourself first, you are in a better situation to help others.

Here is my final example. Do you know the song of Whitney Houston "The Greatest Love of All"? What is the greatest love all? The answer is in the song itself. It goes: "Because the greatest love all is happening to me. Learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all."

So, I will ask you again.

Who is the greatest person on earth?

The answer: YOU.

Child's Reflection

Being a son/daughter is not just a mere biological relationship alone, yet a biological relationship out of love. It is undeniable that a big part of our very being (from the tip of our toenails to the tip of our hardstand) is our parents. It is inevitable that we came into existence because of love. Thus it is as well inevitable for us as a son/daughter to bring and pay back the love to our parents through our actions and words.

DEFINITION:

Being a son/daughter is not that bad at all. In fact, it is so nice to be one. It makes you feel that you are not alone─ that you belong in a family and that you have something to lean on in times of troubles ad difficulties.
But in spite of this benefits being a son/daughter, we have still to consider that we have the responsibilities to do:

"Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you". ─ Exodus 20:12

"Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right". ─ Ephesians 6:1

This is the only responsibility that we are obliged to do: to honor our parents. To honor them means to obey them, love them and respect them. All the time? Not necessarily all the time. You don’t need to love and respect your parents all the time for love fades and perhaps turns to revulsion, disgust .and abhorrence. But instead, honor them all the time for this is the command of God. This is the first commandment with a promise.

Although we have the responsibilities, we have also the rights as son/daughter:

REPUBLIC ACT NO. 7610

An act providing for stronger deterrence and special protection against child abuse, exploitation, and discrimination and for other purposes. .

REPUBLIC ACT NO. 9231
Special protection of children against child’ abuse, exploitation and discrimination act

Recalling an Experience:

I could personally attest their conditional love for me in everyday of my life for they provided me with my needs and tried so hard to give what is best for me. There is a history that really made me realize of my responsibilities as a son/daughter to my parents.

"When I was born, my mother’s life was in jeopardy. The doctor declared that she had a fifty-fifty chance to live due to complications in giving birth to me. Luckily, she survived.

"My staying and studying here in UPV is a great decision to me because for the reason that I came from a poor family. And since I pursue this thing, I have to strive hard in order to pay back the sacrifices that my parents did and still doing right now. I arrived here at Iloilo last April( too early, right?) alone. I had looked for job and some scholarship grants. Unfortunately, I failed. I was so sad. That is why, every night I cried─ thinking of my parents from far afar who are dropping there bloods and perspirations just to send me money for my food. Last Monday, August 20, 2007, my older sister sent me a SMS. It goes: ‘bro, pwede mo na kuhaon ang kwarta. Amo ni ang Control #:IPIL2-KJ26R*****. Ayaw sa guid daw bayad sa bisan ano. Para sa food lang guid na. Ang kwarta na ina, bala-an mo nga inutang lang na. Indi guid mag-uyang sang kwarta sa mga wala pulos nga butang’. I cried again ─ visualizing again my parents working so hard for me and my brother and sisters".

CONCLUSION:

While recalling these stories, I realized that as a child of my parents, I have a great responsibility for they are willing to gamble their lives for their child’s sake. And that is to pay them by doing those responsibilities and doing what we think that can make them happy.

Sa Bawat Pagpatak ng Luha (Synopsis)

Ang 'Sa Bawat Pagpatak ng Luha' ay kwento ni Carlo, isang estudyante sa UP na humaharap sa napakaraming pagsubok sa kanyang buhay. Hindi sana siya makakapag-aral ng UP dahil sa kahirapan ng kanyang pamilya, na ni pamasahe mula Zamboanga papuntang Iloilo ay wala sila. Subalit talagang pursigido si Carlo na mag-UP dahil alam niya na ito ang magiging sagot sa pangarap niyang maihaon sa kahirapan ang kanyang pamilya. Naging masaya siya dahil natupad ito. Subalit naging mali ang lahat ng kanyang mga expectations. Inakala niya na magiging okay na ang lahat pagkapasok niya sa UP. Maliban sa problema sa pamilya, mas nahaharap pa si Carlo sa isang napakalaking hamon - ang pagiging iskolar ng bayan. Pero dahil sa hamong ito, mas naging matatag si Carlo. Mas naging matapang siya. Ang pagganap sa tungkulin sa bayan ang nakikita ni Carlo na mas magiging solusyon sa mga problema, hindi lamang ng kanyang pamilya, kundi ng buong pamayanang Pilipino. Pinili niyang maging isang student activist na patuloy na lumalaban para sa karapatan ng bawat tao. Siya ay naniniwala na ang kahirapan at pagdurusa ng bayan ay hindi lahat dulot ng mga may kapangyarihan. Kung may mga mahihirap na mas lalong naghihirap at kung may isang taong hindi makakain ng tatlong beses sa isang araw, may maling nagaganap. Pero lahat ay may pananagutan sa bawat paghihirap at pagdurusang ito. Bilang UP Student, tayo ay nahaharap sa responsibilidad na ito.

Nabatid ni Carlo na walang magandang maidudulot ang iskeptisismo ng tao. Siya ay tumatawag ngayon ng pagkakaisa sa mga iskolar ng bayan. Tumatawag siya ng pagkilos na sana ay ipaglaban natin ang karapatan ng bawat Pilipino. Huwag na sana nating hintaying may magsimula ng paglaban. Simulan ito sa ating sarili. Tayo ang pag-asa ng bayan. Huwag na nating hintayin maging huli na ang lahat. Huwag na nating hintaying may magdurusa pa at maghihirap. Huwag na nating hayaang papatak pang muli ang kanyang mga luha dahil sa atin lamang nakasalalay ng kung magiging ano si Isko ngayon at bukas.

*abangan ang buong dula sa CM Play Festival sa ika-11 ng Disyembre, 2008 sa UP Auditorium.

Acknowledgment

I would like to express my profound gratitude to the following people who help in making me an Extraordinary UP Student!

To my Mamang and Papang,

Thank you po sa lahat-lahat ng tinuro nyo po. Proud po ako sa inyo dahil I became the person I should be dahil po sa inyo. Congrats mang and pang! Kahit nasa malayo ako ngayon, you will always be my inspiration na makamit ang mga pangarap ko.

To Ate Joyjoy, Jr and Lynlyn,

I thank you, my dearest sis and bro sa lahat ng mga ngiti at saya na pinagsamahan natin for almost 16 years. Hope to see you soon. God bless in your studies. Gogogo!

To Tinang,

To my dearest aunt who was there always to support mamang and papang, and also I, in times of difficulties, and also happiness, thank you!

To my Alma Mater,

Sta. Clara Elementary School and Sta. Clara National High School were my second home. To you I gave my gratitude in molding me intellectually. Without you, I may not be here now.

To Balay Ilonggo Dormitory,

My first home in Iloilo, where I stayed for almost one year, Thank you. Smile, tears, laughter, anger, sorrow, lonesome is Balay Ilonggo. Though it was yesterday, it is part of my life which won’t be erased.

To Pangkat Lingkod Bayan (PALABAN Party),

This organization gave (and has been giving) me the meaning of the words ‘friendship’, ‘home away from home’ and ‘PANDA (Principled, Autonomous, Nationalistic, Democratic and Active). Thank you PALABAN.

To UPV Navigators and Youth for Christ,

My college life will never be complete without your existence. Keep on spreading Good News to the world and acknowledge God’s Greatness. God is good, all the Time.

To OSA and Bello Scholarship Program,

You are the reasons of my continuous existence here in the university. Without you, I might stop studying and totally forgetting my wish list. Thank you so much!

To UP,

I did not expect I could be in yours. It might be a destiny. Thank you UP for providing students like me who are poor but deserving of a UP Education. You are indeed the answers of every poor youth’s cry. You are the hope of the ‘hope of the motherland’.

To Madam Corazon Del Mundo,

Your book (or, you per se) inspired me. It has given me the motivation and faith to believe in my dreams. Thank you so much. You are truly EXTRAORDINARY, Madam.

And to all my friends from the day I first learn from learning and until now that I have grown up already, thank you for being part of my life. You made my life EXTRAORDINARY!

Child No More

Child No More is a reflection paper. It is also a compilation of my literary articles about my life reflecting on the books I read. Same with my last semester’s paper Sailing by the Flowing River: To Feel More Than to Think that was based on the books Paulo Coehlo and Malcolm Gladwell, which are Like the Flowing River and Blink, respectively.

This semester’s paper will be based on the book of Corazon Del Mundo entitled Being Extraordinary: Living Your Highest Potential. This book focuses on how life framework was molded and how to remold it towards success and happiness.

Let me bring you back to more than a decade ago (from childhood until now) and realize how my past greatly influences who I am now. I will also share to you my wishlist.

What's inside my paper?

Acknowledgments

Yesterday—a reciprocal of present

Longing for Home

Wishes aren't Surreal

Enjoy Reading.

James

Inasalan sa Tubang Doktors

The sidewalk of UP Visayas fronting Iloilo Doctor’s Hospital is just a mere sidewalk when the sun shines. But as the sun falls to sleep, this sidewalk becomes a barbecue land.

It has been almost two years that I’ve been here in Iloilo City. I can still remember the day that I arrived at Fort San Pedro. I was bringing that time a stick of barbecue I ordered at the Superferry. (I remember then that I was deceived by s taxi driver I rode to UPV. Hehe.)

Here in Iloilo City, they call barbecue as “Inasal”, but in our place in Zamboanga Sibugay, we call it “Barbekyu”. It is my favorite viand. There are barbecue stands in our place but they’re far different from those here in Iloilo City. We only have small barbekyu stands compared to the Iloilo inasal stands which are mostly on carts and wheels and are on big display. They only sell few like pork and chicken barbecue, hotdog and chorizo. And also, there are times that we make our own home-made barbekyu.

I stayed at the UPV Dormitory for almost a year. In my first night at the dorm, I wasn’t able to have my dinner. I didn’t really know where to go. The dormitory staff said that I can eat at Nang Lalaine’s Carinderia because it’s very near the dorm or I can just go outside the UP Campus and buy barbecue. “Makabakal ka man da panyapun mo ah. Dira lang bala hu sa Tubang Doktors!” After all, I was still hesitant to go outside the dorm.

A year has passed. Now it’s almost every night that I buy my dinner at Tubang Doktors.

Inasal is indeed delicious and inasalan is very dominant in the city, wherein Mang Inasal and Jo’s Inato (although it is not Ilonggo) are two of the biggest and most popular, yet majority of those inasalan are found along the street. Examples of which are those along E. Lopez Street near West Visayas State University (WVSU) Hospital, along Gen. Luna Street near St. Paul’s Hospital and the “Tubang Doktors”.

“Mmmmm . . . . Manamit guid ya gale! Especially the sinamak and the juice inside.” This is my reaction when I first ate inasal I bought from Tubang Doktors.

I also tried eating at the inasalan near the WVSU Hospital, at Mang Inasal and at the ‘fonts’ (the tinda at the UPV gate along Ybiernas Street). They are all delicious. The differences are the prices, and perhaps the kind of taste they have. I can distinguish one from another, but I found it hard to give an explicit description of the differences of those inasals. What really caught my attention is the Tubang Doktors. It is not just because it’s the nearest or the most affordable, but because it is where I ate Ilonggo Inasal the first time. This research paper gave me the opportunity to know more about inasal at Tubang Doktors.

Friday was a very hot day. I was happy then since my interviewees’ house is just at Infante. Manong Steve Valderama is the owner of “Steve’s Bar-B-Q-Han”, together with his wife, Nang Annabel. They usually purchase meat at the Iloilo Central Market. They sell almost eight kilos of meat a night. With the help of his hinablos  Junjun, Nonoy and Ronald, the meat are then sliced and marinated. The secret is in the marinade. They just put some spices (onion, ahos and patis), banana catsup and Sprite. They will marinate the meat the whole afternoon. They will now wait for the clock to hit 5:45 pm for them to set up their stand there.

They serve Tocino, Baticolon, Tinae (isaw), Porkchop, Liempo, Chicken, Chorizo, Bangrus (Milk Fish) and also rice. Tocino barbecue is the most mabenta to the customers. “Ikaw man bala indi mabakal. Pito lang bala mu!” says Christine, a CM First Year Student. Yes! You read it right. Tocino barbecue is only Php20 for 7 sticks or just Php3 each. Affordable, and rest assured, delicious! Steve Bar-B-Q-Han makes their own tocino.

Every night, their stand is crowded with their loyal customers except when rainy seasons that only few are going there to buy. But who would not loyal? To such affordable yet delicious inasal?

Steve Bar-B-Q-Han has been helping Manong Steve and Manang Annabel in providing their family’s need, most especially that of the education of their children. Because of the inasalan, they have sent their children to school. They have children now studying at the IDC and at the University of San Agustin.

Almost eight years have passed since they started their business. During the early years of their operations, they were eight stands at Tubang Doktors wherein five of which are inasalan. They are also kapehan, carinderia and sari-sari stores. Long before, at night, they even put their tables on the street sides because there were fewer vehicles that time. But, they were prohibited to do so for some traffic reasons.

As years gone by, the number of stands selling at Tubang Doktors has been slowly decreasing. This is because of the great competition among them, wherein some stands have more customers than others, thus making those inferior stands close and leave the Tubang Doktors. At present time, there are already seven stands at Tubang Doktors  three of which are inasalan.

The couple is very thankful to God because of the inasalan which has brought them graces. “Thanks guid sa Ginoo, sa inasalan, sa mga customers kag sa manumit namon nga inasal.” says Nang Annabel. (Steve Bar-B-Q-Han also accepts orders. You can contact them at 09207889583.)

So, I invite you to buy a dinner. Kitakitz ah! Ti kay basi makit-anay man kita sa Tubang Doktors.

About the Author

Joy James A. Saguino is a second year BS Accountancy student currently studying at University of the Philippines Visayas, Iloilo City. As for the name, he doesn’t want to be called ‘Joy’ for it sounds feminine. Following the advice of his family, he took up BS Accountancy even though writing is his passion and journalism will always be in his heart.

Currently, he doesn’t stop reading books for personality development and self-improvement to enhance his skill for writing and to continue his growth as an individual.

He is a man molded by time through trials and hardships and have achieved it all because of perseverance.

You can reach Jj through:

Blog site:
http://www.jamesisnotjames.blogspot.com

Friendster:
http://www.friendster.com/upiskolarngbayan

Email:
james@upvcmbatch2007.7p.com
jj_sa_upvisayas@rocketmail.com

Mobile:
092x73x04x7
09265x89x2x

Wishes aren’t surreal

“Wish a wish a wish a wish a wish wish wish!!!” This is one of the tag lines of one Filipino Christmas Special movie. The story is about a family of orphans were left in their aunts. However they were maltreated. A fairy came out to grant the wishes of the children . . . and the lived happily ever after.

I do not normally believe in wishes. It sounds surreal and is just applicable to fairy tales. I do not make wishes in my birthday (since there were no candles to blow, so how would I? Haha! Well, just kidding.) . But, it’s true. Every birthday, they would ask me to lose my eyes and make a wish ‘daw’. I did close my eyes, but to wish? Never. I do not why, but. . . Hmmmp? I cannot explain. It’s just it.

But, life is a constant change. There were moments in my life that somehow, persuades me to believe in wish. I asked, “What will I lose if I believe so?” but, there is more to that reason. I have that intuition that what if wishes really do come true. Here’s one proof: I am studying now at UP.

From all the hardships I’ve encountered in life, I started to believe in wishes. Wish for me is somewhat a root of motivation or a ‘motivating factor’ to keep a person struggling. It increases hope and sense of responsibility since a wish will become a plan sooner or later. Action is expected of wishes. Wishes won’t have essence if there are no corresponding actions taken down. It will just be a wish written in a paper, crumpled, and then thrown in a trash.

As an eldest son from a poor family, I have a very high motivation to take my family away from poverty, especially now that mamang and papang are weak and oftentimes sick. This high motivation comes from the high willingness to achieve my wishes.

You might wander: what could be my wishes? I will enumerate that all later in this article.

There was a big pressure for me in terms of academics during high school. I was first honor from Kindergarten until Elementary graduation. Due to some things, I only got the 5th place in my second year though I was the first during the 1st Grading till 3rd Grading. Worst happened in my second year when I ranked 6th in a Grading period. There came a time that my parents themselves discouraged me. They believe (and so am I) that there was something wrong in me. I lack the motivation. I got exhausted with other things. Until I pray and wish to be back on the ranked I deserve to be with. My motivation increased. I felt that I became more responsible in doing tasks thinking that I have a wish and a promise to myself. It bore good fruits. I graduated valedictorian in high school.
I have just heard of UP since my second year in college. I really planned to study there because of their affordable fees and of the Iskolar ng Bayan Program or the STFAP.

I really cried when I check the website of UPCAT, I passed it! I passed it! I passed it! I did not expect that I would pass it. My exam was Sunday 7 in the morning. I traveled to the test center for four hours from our house. Imagine!? And I had cough, cold (a runny nose) and toothache that time! The funny thin is in the runny nose. Maybe you can now make a picture in your mind how was I during the exam day. But, because I was very motivated to pursue my college in UP, I really took to the exam despite of my health conditions. I believe that UP can help me in my goal of taking my family away from poverty.

And now that I am here, I am now very near to my wishlist:

1] to be CPA (if I’ll be retained in the BS Accountancy Program) or, perhaps pursue my passion ─journalism. But I know, I will be retained and I will be a Certified Public Accountant.

2] to have a land we can call ‘ours’ and build a home there.

3] to migrate either in Europe, Australia or Canada and work. Do not worry. I will never forget Filipino customs. Once a Filipino, always a Filipino!
4] to institute a scholarship program to those financially but deserving college students. I believe that what I have received is what I will give and I still embrace the UP’s Motto: STP (Serve the People). Always remember what Rizal said “Youth is the hope of the motherland.”

5] to donate to UPV a sum of money for development purposes.

Those are just few of my wishes, which will eventually become plans, as well someday. With God’s guidance and with my appropriate actions, wishes will come true. Now I justify that wishes tat come true are not just present in fairy tales. Anyone who thinks that way is absolutely wrong. I even doubt if it does exist in fairy tales, because fairy tales have not yet been justified as existing world.

Thus, wishes are not surreal. It only does exist in us ─through our actions, it becomes real; through our experiences, it becomes LIFE, an EXTRAORDINARY LIFE.

Yesterday—a reciprocal of present

June 18, 1991, 2 A.M. — The moment I took my first breath. Unconsciously, smiles and tears filled the faces of the people around me. That is always the respond of the people whenever a new life is given.

I was an intelligent child (as what most of the people say). I learned to read and write at the age of 3 years old. I use to sing sometimes at a ‘videokehan’ (where I drop 3 pesos for every song) and then, I can read the lyrics, and sing the song. A lot were amazed of me.

I was send to Grade 1 when I was five as a ‘class visitor’. But after two months, I decided to stop and really start at Kindergarten. It was a good decision because I will be missing a piece of childhood (though my teacher said I was the one leading the class).

I have a vague memory now of my kindergarten days. I just saw some of my pictures during our graduation. I was holding then the letter ‘A’, which means ‘valedictorian’. Hehehe.

Now, I really assume that I got mature earlier than the normal. When I was Grade 1, I can still remember when my teacher left; I was the one who was assigned to be her substitute for a while. She was going to the principal’s office, but we were having a quiz. I saw one of my classmates cheating. I got a stick of ‘walis tingting’ and spank him. He cried. Was I wrong? A part of me said that I was right. I was grown in a critical way. Both my parents and teachers have been teaching me not to cheat. “Cheating is Bad” as what they said. Isn’t it that what I did is justifiable?

But, something was telling me that “James, you are bad! You better watch out! Your teacher is coming in a short while. She will get mad at you!” Oh my gosh! I remembered. Ma’am was indeed coming. As what I expected, she got mad at me. I was summoned then from the principal’s office. And so was my mother. My mother, also, got angry. That time, I felt everyone was angry and mad at me.

Was I really wrong? Perhaps, it’s a yes and a no. Even now, as a 17-year old guy, I cannot judge it whether right or wrong. Perhaps, here comes the issue of maturity. Maturity is really difficult to recognize and identify but for me, maturity is the ability to discern things as right or wrong and be able to make important decisions. It does not necessarily mean that a mature person should be at this age. There is no definite standard for maturity in terms of age. The question now is, is it wrong to judge certain things as right or wrong? Though you already have the justifications that what that person did was indeed wrong? My answer to this is NO. For some it’s wrong, but they have to consider the legitimacy of the purposes why they did it. Perhaps, disciplining is a reason. (We have to take note here that disciplining is not abusing.). In the near future, you’ll find it beneficial.

I just smile every time I remember those times. Did I turn mature early? For me, yes. I got an early maturity in terms of intellectual capacity, responsibilities and critical thinking. It sounds ‘proud’ but, it is not a big deal, isn’t it? It is part of a person’s personal development. It just happened that mine was early.

It was very early that I encountered a lot of quandary. I have learned to be strong but vulnerable since being strong doesn’t always demand for invulnerability. Being strong also means you already accepted what would be the possible consequences in fighting, whether to win it or lose it. Invulnerability doesn’t manifest absence of strength. It is just every person has emotions, and emotions are not always our strengths, but can be our great weaknesses that can lead to a failure. But, I am strong. My parents made me strong from their teachings. I sometimes remember a phrase “Not all teachings are learning.” This made me critical. This made me fight. This made me face the battles without turning backs.

My past holds a big role of me now. ‘James’ now is the result of what he experienced before ―on how he viewed his reality ―that made him EXTRAORDINARY.

Longing for Home

April 16, 2007 ─The day I left home. I was just 15 years old that time when I traveled to Iloilo which is very very far away from Zamboanga Sibugay, my home place. It took me a lot of guts to be this far from my family whom I stayed with for all my life.

533 days, 14 hours and 56 minutes had passed-from the moment I spread my own wings and wander away from my parent's security and guidance and until now that I am writing this piece of article. Though it was almost 2 years ago, I cannot shun remembering my past and how it made me evolve into the "James" now.

"Dodong! Mata na dira! Udto na!" (Dodong, wake up! It's late now!) (Dodong is a Cebuano term used to call young boys.)

Hmmp? It sounds familiar to me.

Well . . . How could I ever forget these lines? This is the wake up call of my mother everyday most especially during school days that school hour starts at seven in the morning. But before we can go to school, we should make sure that all the dishes are well-washed. (Including those unwashed last night) That is why my sister and I are always late in going to school. This 'wake up call' had been a routine for 10 years (since Grade 1 until our 4th High School).

And when we arrive home from school, we are back to household choirs- fetch waters (This should be done quickly because water supply is scheduled and will be turned off automatically at 6 in the evening), cook food for dinner and do the packaging of the bread. After all is done, we can now open our notebooks and do the homework.

But when the clock hits ten in the evening, the four of us (my siblings and I) should go to sleep. No one can stay awake (or even study) beyond it.

College life is really different. Ten in the evening for me is very (very much) early to sleep. (Yet, my family is not aware of what I have been doing now.) I will be so lucky if I can sleep for three to four hours a day. Sometimes, I do no have sleep at all (even a nap). I miss those loud shouts of my mother saying “Tulog na mo! Gabie na! Dili lagi magbilar ba!” (Sleep now! It’s late already. I told you not to get stress!)

And when the four of us are in bed already, I sometimes go outside to urinate. I can still hear noise coming from the bakery. I took some glimpse. I saw mamang and papang still working and baking there. I felt there hardships. It’s very heavy ‘na kahit ako hindi ko kaya’. I like to shout ‘Mang, pang, tama na na. Gabie na! Ayaw pagbilar!’ but I know that they are only doing those for us, their siblings. I promised to myself that in the near future, they won’t be doing those things again. ‘Mark my words’.

But though the light is off, we still do talking with my siblings (Since because the six of us, together with my parents have only one bed). ‘Nakakamis talaga yung magkakasama kaming pamilya sa isang tulugan’ ─ I often think before going to sleep. I remember that we sometimes argue with my younger siblings who will sleep beside mamang and papang. There are also times that one of us would cry because of it. That is why I always pray for sickness (preferably fever) just to sleep beside mamang,

And when I get sick, I saw one time mamang crying. We did not have money to buy for my medicine. I heard ‘Joy (my older sister), agto ila Taning (name of the owner of a store). Pangutang anay ug Biogesic para kay Dodong’. (Joy, go to Taning’s Store. Buy paracetamol on credits for now.)

Tears fell from my eyes. My aim to be my mamang’s arms turned into repentance. I blamed myself (And still keep on blaming now for some other reasons). My pragmatism brought mess and sorrow to me. ‘I hate myself. I am evil. I am selfish’. These are the phrases I keep on thinking whenever I saw my parents having troubles because of me. ‘These should not happen’, I said, and declare, now that papang and mamang are becoming senile; mamang has goiter and papang has some kidney problems. I should not add to there personal burdens, but, should be the one who will help take the burdens away.

Now, right this moment, I am totally unaware on what is/are happening at home. Are they taking right meals at right time? Is my sister safe in travelling to school? Are my younger doing good in their studies? Are mamang and papang fine? Aren’t they sick? I cannot manifest how much I wanted to go back home to check if they are really fine; to, at least, lighten my worries,

I will really miss on how my parents disciplined me. I had received some physical means of discipline (but most are oral). I already understand why they are doing those things. And I am proud of them of disciplining me those ways. I have grown the way I should ─ strong and invulnerable, yet conservative and sensitive; pragmatic and practical, yet critical and rational.

Hhaaayyyy . . . How I wish I could go back to those moments. But I know I can’t. Those moments will be part of my past . . .

my history . . .

my experience . . .

my REALITY . . .

my EXTRAORDINARY LIFE . . . ☺